And a landslide took me down...it has been a long time since those words were made so popular by the band Fleetwood Mac. It is in someways another of those iconic songs that defined an age or period of our lives. For me this song was popular on the radio but it wasn't until I was a newly married man and we began to spend some time at a place called Mione's that this song actually came to be part of our lives. Quiet evenings on the patio, red wine, mozzarella sticks and maybe a pizza and the band would play this among other songs. Somehow it struck home.

There is another line in that song, one that I often repeat to the dismay of many friends..."Time makes us bolder, even children get older, and I'm getting older too." Sometimes the aging process takes you by surprise. Going to the movies and being asked if you want the senior discount or being told you can get in for a very reasonable, read cheap, price on Tuesdays. Or maybe more importantly going to the movies on Tuesdays just because you get the steep discount. Perhaps it sneaks up on you like the time someone asks you for your occupation and you say after a moment of hesitation, retired or being reminded that you need to find a new primary care doctor before medicare kicks in since so many doctors are not taking new patients with Medicare as their primary insurance.

But this post is not really about those practical implications of getting older. It is about the psychological implications of getting older. Most of us who are even close to this age remember when we thought we were invincible. We can remember in the haze a time when we thought it was not wise to trust anyone over 30 because they just did not understand the reality of life in "today's" world. Then we passed 30 and realized either we couldn't trust ourselves or we had to expand the age range a bit.

There are many in the business world who bemoan the so called Millennials and their lack of drive or their inability to care about anyone but themselves. We can fall into the trap of thinking they are lazy or bored or feel entitled but in reality I don't think they are all that different. Every generation thinks it is the best or at least the most in touch with the reality of the day. To some extent that might be correct...at least at some level. The world changes. I am old enough to remember the advent of the personal computer and the time when a gigabyte of memory was considered more than anyone could possibly need. I remember when cell phones first appeared on the scene and when the fax machine was considered high tech for transmitting documents quickly. Today's Millennial generation does't know a time when there weren't computers, they expect speed and don't care about the gig of memory but the gig of speed to upload to the "cloud." Cell phones are now smart phones and there is more computing technology in the palm of your hand than in the space craft that took man to the moon.

They face interesting challenges in finding employment. We told them that they needed a college education to get a good job but then there are no jobs and they wonder what the degree is for as the make my drink at Starbucks. We told them if they worked hard and got good grades etc...they would be able to do anything. And then they find the new reality makes that a lie. They are in someways cynical...no wonder they don't trust us let alone believe we understand the reality of their world.

Against this backdrop they are carrying on life. They are hooking up, moving in together and sometimes even getting married. They are having children and raising families and making life work. But this perspective makes their lives very different. Where we might have longed for the presence of our parents in our lives and our childrens' lives this is not always possible for this new generation of families. Mobility...jobs...take them away. They seek position anywhere because in this post internet globalization the world has shrunk, at least in our minds. They look for places that are safe, sustainable, green, with good wifi and feel they can work from anywhere. And where does that leave us. We are getting older too...we want to be close to doctors, close to hospitals, close to friends and family if possible. We are not invalids, we are active, more than our parents generation, but, we come from a different perspective...we value different things in life.

Out of this comes tension....not a new phenomenon. Parents trying to help their kids, kids thinking about themselves and their families and what is best for them and resisting the "old ways." It is, in fact, a story as old as time. Generational differences will always exist. We tend to grow more conservative over time, we want to hold on to what worked for us. We forget that we too did things differently. Letting go is still hard.

Just a thought, but we need to remember that even children get older and we are growing older too.

V