...without the love story, the singing or the dancing. Yes, I am an American in Paris and I am trying not to be an ugly American, one of those who feel somehow whatever we do in America would be good for the world. But, still I have to wonder.

So many people think of Paris as the “City of Lights” the “City of Romance” but to me, I have spent too much time in the company of the “seedy underbelly” to think I would ever really like living here. In the past three months I have been pickpocked three times. I have had to replace all my credit cards and drivers license and lost many other notes and cards and stuff one keeps in a wallet. I have taken to keeping my wallet at home and only taking one credit card and a small amount of cash and keeping that in a front pocket while walking with my hand in my pocket to protect it. And still, while getting on the Metro carrying a child’s assortment of necessary supplies I was pickpocketed again. This time I felt it and turned to see the pickpocket who dropped the wallet on the floor of the Metro train.

Then yesterday, hand in my pocket with my money and credit card, carrying a stroller I happened again. This time it was my iPhone that was taken. I don’t usually take the iPhone with me since I have the cellular data and telephone turned off. I only use it for the Wifi connectivity, and on occasion the camera...such was the case yesterday. We went to the Tuileries Garden with our grand children and their parents. Ten of us all together. It was a great day. The kids had fun on the playground, we enjoyed the fountains and the trees and the parents had some time to talk and we burned off a whole lot of childhood energy with the hope of good night sleeps.

We got on the Metro for the ride home and it was very crowded...not a good situation if you are trying to avoid the pickpockets of Paris but that was the situation and...it happened. My son saw the guy take the Phone and signaled to me but I had my hand in my pocket and knew I had not lost my money so I said it’s OK...never thought about the other pocket having anything but keys and they were still there. Paris won again.

One has to wonder is this socialist country with its motto of freedom, equality, and brotherhood has any idea of how they are seen from the outside. It is a city where there are signs posted in public places to remind you about pickpockets...they know they exist. It is city that thinks that it is your responsibility to protect yourself. It is a country that has a higher than average unemployment rates with hundreds of thousands of young men and women without jobs. It is a country that allows its borders to be crossed by all who are looking for a new home where social services are available as long as you come from within the EU. This increases the unemployment and the number of beggars and thieves. People only trying to make a living by what ever means they know.

I am for the most part a generous person. I give money and food to beggars on the street, see my earlier post about the woman and child. I try to protect my belongings from those outside the law but one cannot always be so careful...well maybe they can but we are not taught to live that way in America. I have walked the streets of Buenos Aires, Rio de Janeiro, even Bogotá. I have never had problems in Tokyo, or London, or Liecester, or Cardiff, or Krakow, or Budapest, or Frankfurt, or Stuttgart, or Amsterdam, or Barcelona, or Palma. I’ve been pickpocketed three times in Paris. I’ve been left alone in New York, Washington DC, Atlanta, Chicago, Los Angeles, San Francisco, even Detroit but I’ve been pickpocketed three times in Paris.

So my love of this city has pretty much been taken from me. I really have not desire to visit this city other than to see my grand daughters and my son and daughter-in-law. I use to think my problems were mine and would go away if I learned some French but, clearly the pickpockets of Paris don’t want to talk to me. I have to say that if someone asked me about visiting France...I would tell them of the wonderful people, the great food, the lovely fresh produce in Lyon, or Provence but I would tell them to stay away from Paris. If they have to come here don’t walk the streets without a security belt to stash your valuables, don’t take a phone, hold on to your camera and doubt everyone you see. When you think you want to take a bus or Metro, don’t get on if the car is crowded and if you have to...put all your valuable in one pocket and keep your hand on it. Your metro tickets may get demagnetized by the phone but it is worth the risk if you want to keep what’s yours, yours.

This is not a city that likes people. Walks on the sidewalks turn into one constant game of “Chicken” to see who will move over to give way to the other. I’ve had young single men and women stand their ground forcing me into the street to get around them while carrying a baby on my chest and two bags of groceries up the hill. It is a city that will become exasperated with you because your credit card does not have a chip and has to be swiped. They offer big deep sighs when you don’t have exact change...which you may have it they would only speak a bit slower so you could understand or put the screen on the cash register where it can be seen by the customers who can’t speak French rapidly or understand they mumbling French.

If I sound a bit bitter about life in Paris you are getting the message. I was trying to love this city. There were some evenings when I would look out my window over the street and think this city could be OK. There were some people, the man across the street who owns a wonderful bar/restaurant who smiles even if I don’t speak his language. He is patient with me and says the numbers slowly. We get along and I think maybe this city is going to be OK afterall. Then that gets stolen from me along with my wallet or my phone. Three time is too much for me to get over.

It is not the phone that matters. It is just a thing…it was destined to be replaced once we got home to the States. It is the loss of what was on it. The photos and videos taken yesterday of the grandchildren bouncing on the trampolines, the pictures of the family/families just being together. It is the loss of Apps that will have to be replaced. It is the contacts...email and phone numbers...that I have lost. It is all the stuff that we keep on our phones now that matters. The Apps are all password protected...the accounts they access are password protected...but the phone was not, too much bother I thought.

But now...who knows. Two months and we go home to the US. This may be our last extended stay in Paris. Next time and the rest of this visit...we will only go out into the streets of Paris with a wary view of the people. I will keep all my valuables in one pocket and keep my hand in the pocket. I will not take much money with me and only one credit card….easier to cancel. Paris won...it proved itself to be a very un-welcoming city. It replaced the idea of an ugly American with the very real experience of the ugly Frenchman...or at least the ugly Parisian.